Sunday 13 May 2007

Weeks 16, 17 &18 - slow

I've had a difficult 3 weeks back at school. I'm looking for a new job - really to cut down on my travelling (52 miles each way which takes about 75mins - 90 mins) but also because I'm really unhappy in my current post. I'm unhappy for a lot of reasons - feeling undervalued, marginalised and really unsupported by my manager. I'm really good at my job and tis is the first time I've felt like this. The reasons are complicated but really not my fault. I can stick up for myself but sometimes you get so tired of being in conflict all the time and I feel like that just now. I've tried to discuss it but I know my manager just finds me challenging and doesn't seem to like me anyway. She actively avoids any contact with me - when I go to talk to her she rolls her eyes and watches the clock. She even tells me about jobs she's seen for me - how demoralising is that? She knows that I can do my job - I'm producing the school timetable - se just doesn't like me, I guess.
Moving sideways to another depute post in a secondary school is proving more difficult than I anticipated.I've now had 6 interviews. I generally interview really well (although I have mucked up a couple!) but problem is that you have no way of knowing the internal politics etc. I guess it's fair enough if someone has been doing the job for months and doing well that they get the post - I just wish they didn't have to advertise it and put everyone through the charade of interviews!

Anyway - I've see sawed a bit on CD these last 3 weeks. I've had a few days off. Some of these to eat out with friends - you really need them when you're down - and some just because I was hungry. Slowed down the weight loss but didn't put on !!!!I'm not bingeing though - a few days ago I made a huge plate of vegetables and smothered it in vinegar (love it). Going to make a huge effort this next 2 weeks !

So... in last 3 weeks I have lost 5lbs.

Starting Weight 18st 7 lbs
Current Weight 14st 9lbs
Total loss 3st 12lbs